“Back to School” Becomes “Leave to Learn”
People keep asking (somewhat skeptically), “What about school during your trip — are you homeschooling?” I keep answering (somewhat defensively), “No; our kids will do the same work as they would do in school, with real teachers assigned to help them, so they won’t fall behind.” I expound on the educational benefits of the trip and explain that we’re taking the year off largely for the kids’ sake. But inwardly I’m less confident, and all summer I have worried about “back to school” — about the transition to schooling our kids on the road.
My "roads scholars" pictured earlier this summer near Tahoe.
I know it’s kind of crazy, because we’ll encounter extraordinary educational opportunities at every turn. Plus, most wise people recognize that learning takes place all the time and is more apt to blossom outside the confines of a classroom. So why the worry and resistance to the idea of homeschooling?
At the root is my fear of being inadequate as a teacher, and anxiety that my kids won’t “keep up” with their peers. My knee-jerk response to anxiety is to try to control the circumstances and outcomes; hence, I got our school supplies in place, got the kids working on academic review workbooks, and envisioned us sitting around a table starting a half-day, five-day-a-week schooling routine on the same day their real school back home reopens (August 26). In other words, I felt determined to replicate their 3rd- and 6th-grade classroom experience during travel.
Thank goodness I had an epiphany (or more of a “well, duh” moment) that my approach might cause us to miss a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for us all to learn in a different, potentially better way. I came across information and encouragement, highlighted below, that has made me less stressed, less rigid and much more excited about our adventure in “roadschooling.”
First, some background on how “school” will work for our family this year: We are fortunate to be in a high-quality public school district that granted both kids independent study contracts for the school year. Kyle has a 3rd-grade teacher assigned to him from his elementary school, and Colly has a 6th-grade teacher assigned to her from the middle school. Last spring, we all met and devised a plan for the coming year. (This was fairly simple because, as luck would have it, another local family did this same thing the previous year and paved the way for us to follow their example.)
Under the contract, the kids will follow the core curriculum, communicate with their teacher approximately once a week via email and periodically turn in a sampling of work — enough homework and special projects so that the teacher can see the child is following the program and meeting the standards. It’s up to Morgan and me to do the bulk of instruction and review their work. We see it as a win-win: our kids get an educational plan designed to meet grade-level standards, plus a teacher to help them long-distance. They also get to feel like they’re still a part of their school. We parents get the structure of the curriculum and expertise of its teachers, and we avoid the bureaucratic and legal hurdles many homeschooling parents face when they pull their kids out of school. The school district, meanwhile, gets the daily attendance money from the state that it would otherwise lose if our kids un-enrolled; plus, the district gets two kids who will re-enter school the following year more likely to succeed, having followed the school’s program during their year away.
Kyle's summer workbook (click for amazon link). Colly did the Grade 5 - 6 one.
Sounds great, doesn’t it? My doubts crept in, however, when I grappled with how and when to teach my kids. As a warm-up, I bought them each workbooks in the Summer Bridge Activities series to review the basics they learned the previous school year, and to get us all used to “doing school” at home. The workbooks themselves are quite good — a nice mix of language arts, math, science and history, formatted in a manageable “daily dose.”
But after about a week, our workbook routine began to devolve from enthusiastic and fruitful (concepts reviewed, discussions sparked) to laborious and futile (kids groaning and rolling eyes while saying, “Do I have to?” … me hovering and overly correcting their work, repeating “Just get it done”). I see in hindsight I was too authoritative about determining when they should work during the day, and I set arbitrary deadlines for when they should complete the lessons. I beat myself up: In a mere matter of weeks, I made them view academic work as a chore and to dread having me as their teacher.
I took a deep breath, cut myself slack and tried to open my mind. (Easier said than done!) Here is some of the advice that helped me regroup and take a fresh approach to this year of schooling:
- Have confidence that the kids will learn not only what they’re “supposed to” learn, but immeasurably more; and that what they learn on the road and through their own volition is more likely to stick and positively shape them. This point is emphasized by homeschooling experts such as Helen Hegener, who wrote that her children taught her to “relax and trust that learning was always happening, with or without my help, and the learning that happened without my assistance was much more likely to be useful and relevant.” I also heard this point made by other round-the-world blogging families such as The Andruses of Utah, who wrote: “On the road, school is a round-the-clock, ever-changing experience, a 7-day-a-week field trip that teaches them more about the world and themselves than they could ever learn at home.”
- Try not to always measure their progress and productivity by traditional, quantitative means (e.g. minutes spent reading, number of answers correct), and don’t keep comparing them to their peers back home; rather, embrace this chance to let them learn individually and independently, more in tune with their own pace and learning style. Measure their success as much by the spirit of the process as by the end result. The confidence and love of learning they gain will pay off in the long run. I know this advice is hard for me to follow, so I’ll re-read those lines the next time I grow impatient by how long it takes my daughter to do a page of math problems or exasperated by how many seemingly simple words my son misspells in a paragraph. If she “gets it” and feels good about it, that’s great, no matter how long it takes; if he has bright thoughts and clever word choices driving those misspellings, then that’s terrific.
- Stop thinking of myself as a teacher who can dump facts into my kids’ heads, as if I could program them to download information at my command. It helps me to recall a moment when we were in the Smithsonian last Spring Break. The kids kept wanting to run off and see something that caught their eye. Their voices bubbled with interest, “Look, Mom, check this out!” But instead, I held them back; I said, “No, wait, come here and listen to this,” and I would proceed to read out loud each exhibit’s caption. They grew bored and stopped listening to my lectures. Then they lost their eagerness to run and explore other exhibits — they just wanted to run away from me. It’s an all-too-typical example of how I can be overly controlling and fall into power struggles with the kids. On this trip, I’ll try to follow their lead more often, and to think of myself as a student alongside them, hopefully sharing and supporting their curiosity.
- Be flexible with expectations and scheduling so that we can learn by exploring our surroundings, and by letting the kids follow their natural interests. (See point above.) How silly it would be to say “no” if the kids wanted to take a special hike or see a performance one weekday morning because we set a schedule to get through a textbook chapter during that time slot.
- Try to practice the principles of Positive Discipline by Jane Nelsen. This involves using encouragement and abiding by the belief that kids do well when they feel well; balancing kindness and firmness; coming up with solutions together to resolve conflict instead of threatening consequences; and letting children take risks, do things on their own and learn from mistakes. This book is one of the best and most effective parenting books I ever read. But it’s counter-intuitive to the way I’ve always done things, so I need to re-read it and keep working on it.
One of my favorite parenting books, which helps with teaching too (click for amazon link).
We’re taking risks and have lots to learn. I’m sure we’ll make mistakes all along the way. But I’m going to try to view that as cause for celebration, not concern.
Related posts:
- Two Months To Go
- A New Season, A New Way
- “Home”schooling So Far
- Playing Around Rotorua
- When It Rains…
Tags: family travel, homeschooling, parenting, Piedmont, preparation, Roadschooling, RTW, Sarah_Lavender_Smith, travel advice
Sarah,
Have faith that the experiences your children will have on this journey will stay with them all their life – unlike most rote schoolwork, which is forgotten in a few years at most.
Funny that you name-checked Helen Hegener. I grew up about fifteen miles from the Hegeners (where I was homeschooled completely up to age ~14).
-Jasper
Jasper, thank you so much for your vote of confidence and sage advice. What are you, a rocket scientist or somethin’?
FYI to others — talking to Jasper during a long run, and hearing about his homeschooling background, helped inspire our trip. This guy is a world-class ultrarunner and research physicist at Cal’s Space Science Lab.
Hey Sar -
Merritt has strong feelings (mostly pro, only a few con) about her homeschooled high school experience. She is exclusively amongst homeschoolers now at this point in the conservatory/pre-pro level travels of her ballet world. I have to say from a parent’s perspective that her peers are some of the most well-spoken, confident, independent thinking young people I have encountered (as is Merritt!). Homeschooling can afford so many unique opportunities. Embrace this year and let go of the expected. Let your kids stretch. You get to go back to the traditional soon enough. The “Three Rs” will be fine. What you are supplementing their education with this year is immeasurable. You will be a great teacher so relax and enjoy. No worries!
Love you – Martha
Another terrific post, Sarah. Your honesty just makes me smile. That thoughtfulness and willingness to admit when you’re getting it wrong make you a great parent *and* teacher. It’s going to be a great year. Lucky kids.
Simply exposing kids to a different culture is huge educational benefit. I learned more Spanish with one month in Mexico than three years of classes.
Hi Sarah,
As you know, our family is in our first year as homeschoolers. So many thoughts but first don’t try to re-create school, that is for the masses not individuals. Let Colly and Kyle plan participate and “own” the schooling plan.
Have you thought about doing a unit study type of curriculum where they get to choose a study topic that interests them and you can help them choose writing, literature, history even mathematics related to their topic of interest. In addition to the 3 traditional R’s, focus on research, reasoning and recording.
I develop an agenda with my boys for their projects and assignments for the week. We review their agenda and then it is their responsibility to stay on task and finish their work seeking assistance as needed. For my ten year old we review the agenda at the end of the week and both reflect on his progress. For my nine year old we review each day, as he needs a bit more guidance and structure. Sometimes we make a daily schedule of tasks. But I let both boys plan how long they think their agenda items will take. Very quickly they become astute planners of their day and work. When they are focused and
motivated, they will increase their free time for themselves.
Remember now that you are “out of the classroom” you have time and opportunity to get away from worksheets and do exploratory and reflective work in all disciplines. For example, while we traveled we read literature that linked to our locations. When we visit ruins we sometimes spend a good part of a day at one site drawing and imagining a long ago world. A worn pair of stairs stone steps alone with a few stones of a foundation can become the beginning of an drawing or a short story as we tried to piece the ancient world together in our imagination using facts we have researched. Right now we are studying the European colonization of NZ and Colin has just written a fictional story from a young Maori boy’s first encounter with European explorers. To make his fictional story authentic he is incorporating all his research from our trips to the Waitangi Treaty grounds, local museums as well as fiction and non-fiction we’ve read. We seek experts on his topic to consult. He has to be knowledgeable and prepared for his informational interviews of these experts.
I am rambling, but the take home point is to have fun, explore, and give Colly and Kyle choice, ownership and responsibility for their learning. Be a guide, advisor and facilitator this year.
On a “fieldtrip”, give the kids/students a task for the day. If they are doing a certain project can they do some research on their topic? Or can they do a “treasure hunt” searching for some interesting facts. By the end of the day, can they explain… can they find examples of…Do you remember Chuck Warren’s physic days at Magic Mountain?
Carolyn, thank you so much for your wonderful comment … I agree with what you say, and it strikes me how much you sound like my wise brother; that is, I think he would say we should fully homeschool as you describe, as opposed to the hybrid we’re doing under the school district’s independent study. But since we want the kids to re-enter the schools when we get back, we feel it’s best to do the independent study and cover the core material for their 6th and 3rd grades. That said, I think we can do it in a way that is pretty close to the style you describe and thus gives us many of the benefits of homeschooling for at least a year.
I definitely will follow a key piece of your advice (which also is a principle of Positive Discipline): to involve the kids in the planning and prioritizing of their learning, so that they can “own it” and have the responsibility and pride of it. On a practical level, this means Morgan and I will figure out on a month-by-month basis roughly what units/lessons/areas of study the kids should be covering to get through the bulk of material we all agreed to cover for the year; but we will have weekly family meetings to let them take the lead in planning what we’re going to do week to week. I really like what you wrote re working together to set a weekly agenda and leaving it to the boys to fulfill it. I also love the interdisciplinary nature of how your kids are learning, which we will try to emulate. Finally, I really appreciate the reminder that I am the kids’ “guide, advisor and facilitator,” not a teacher in the traditional classroom sense; I am there to help and guide when/if they need it, but I really need to step back and let them take the initiative in their learning. The value for me of doing this blog post and hearing from you and others is it has bolstered my confidence to have the flexibility, creativity, and trust in the kids and myself to do it.
We have so much to talk about … I can hardly wait until January to see you!
Sarah-
Just wanted to say Hi! and give you support. Know that I’m following your blog and think it sounds terrific! We’re about to move back to New York, and talk about our “re-entry” all the time with the kids, especially Helena (9). They are excited to go back, and at the same time are realizing what an amazing time we’ve had together: so much new stuff that we’ve discovered as a family in just one year abroad. You have a more mobile plan than we had, but the journey is great, just to get away for a while. How lucky you are to have such a cooperative school, and great touchpoint every week! Fantastic resources available to you. We coordinated with our school in New York what classes the girls would be taking so that when they returned they would not be behind either, and I hope we did alright with that, but whatever they may not have learned exactly, they definitely learned other things which I couldn’t have planned or predicted. We are here for another 2 and a half weeks, and then it’s back home….I can’t believe it! All the best to you, Morgan and the kids!!
Sarah, the best teachers don’t “dump information into their heads” anyway. We are not all-knowing. My philosophy is that teachers are guides. We provide the experiences in a variety of ways (written, oral, kinesthetic,musical…) and it’s the kids themselves who assimilate the information and construct their knowledge. I think you are right on track. I loved your reference to the museum incident. It’s so true that we try to control learning situations to work for our needs rather than our kids’. Keep me up to date!
Hi,
It’s fun to read your blog since we just returned from an eight-month trip in our VW van with our 7-year old. We even travelled with the Bodeswell family for a week, so I came to your site to read the interview with them.
Now our daughter is having some trouble integrating back into school, but that’s partly because school is in French and she spent the year learning to read in English. I’m still glad for all the amazing things she learned during our trip, things she will remember all her life.